Friday Sunrise and Other Sights

Since it’s not bone-chillingly cold anymore, one of my favorite things to do now is to get up really early in the morning and go for a walk.  Actually, my favorite thing is NOT getting up really early, but that’s the only time I’m able to go.  I do apologize, however, to anyone who has the misfortune of having to be near me at 5:30 a.m.  because…..well, it ain’t pretty.  But I really do love walking, and I was getting kind of tired of P90X, so this early morning walking business is working out really well. 

Anyway…..

I took my camera with me this morning on my walk.  I only dropped it once, so I was pretty proud of myself, too.  When I wasn’t taking pictures, I put in my fanny pack so it would be safe.  That’s right, I wore a fanny pack.  And I wore it proudly.  

Anyway (again)…..

Here’s the first part of the trail. 

Looks creepy, huh?  And no, it wasn’t like 2 a.m. or anything like that; it was 5:45 or so, it was still just really dark.  I was a little scared, so I hurried through this part.  Plus, I’m really good at freaking myself out.  I start thinking of all kinds of things that could be lurking in the woods, like rabid foxes, gigantic prehistoric spiders, or people dressed in anime costumes, like this:

Okay, Person In Costume, I don’t know who you are and I’m really not trying to judge you, but you frighten me.  Hey, if you want to wear a flesh-colored unitard, school girl skirt, thigh highs, and an anime mask and wig, then that’s your business.  Really, it is.  I’m sure that underneath that hair and unitard, you have normal sized eyes and you’re a really nice person and we could probably even find something we have in common.   And honestly, I’m a pretty open-minded person….but if I see you, I’m going to be a little a lot disturbed, and I will likely prepare myself for some sort of attack.  Yeah, I saw The Strangers.  I don’t mess around with people in masks. Freaks my shit out.

Anyway……..I needed to get out of that dark part of the trail, and I needed to do it fast. You just never know.

Next, I came up to this bridge.  A few months ago, it was covered in spray paint and Sharpie messages of people declaring everlasting love for each other, or complimenting them on their “abilities,”  or just pointing out that that they were there.  Because we all give a crap that “Becky was here, 9/27/10.”  Thankfully, someone painted over all that.  It’s like Becky was never even there.

As I crossed the bridge, I looked to my left and saw this:

How beautiful.  I looked to my right and saw this:

I thought to myself, “Sigh….I just love nature.  I love walking out here among the trees and wildlife.  Life is wonderful. La la la.” 

Then I walked into a spiderweb and my serene and blissful mental state was shattered.  Again, I hurried on through a dark and evil part of the trail.

A mile or so passed, and as the sun rose higher, I settled into a rhythm of walking, snapping pictures every so often, and checking over my shoulder for the anime chick.  I’m mostly kidding about that last part.  But here are some of the shots I got:

I was so busy taking pictures, that I nearly stepped in this:

Yeah, I took a picture of poop.  So what?  It’s hairy, so it’s like really weird poop, which definitely makes it a good candidate for a blog photo.

After that, though, I tried to pay more attention to where I was walking, and I did a really good job for awhile.  I was focused, alert, and keeping a brisk pace while avoiding piles of poop and other gross things, like icky slugs. 

Then…..I had a momentary lapse of unagi.  You know what unagi is, right?  Remember that episode of Friends where Ross schools Rachel and Phoebe on the importance of being alert?  Here, I’ll just show you:

So in that brief moment of disconnect with unagi, I almost stepped on this:

I know you can’t tell from the picture, but this thing was the size of a Frisbee.  I am not even exaggerating.  Okay, maybe a little, but it was at least the size of a hockey puck, if you take into account the leg span and all that.  So bascially, it was HUGE.  And I didn’t see it until I was right on top it.  Of course, the natural reaction in that situation is for one to leap into the air, flail one’s arms, and scream loudly enough for birds to take flight from overhead trees. 

That’s what I did anyway.  I’m really glad only like 4 other people in Grandview get up at dawn to walk on the trail, and they were all on another part of it.

The silver lining to that terrifying moment was that it made my heart beat faster than any brisk walking could ever do, plus it encouraged me to get the hell outta there.  A spider web, furry turds, and a plus-sized spider were enough for me for one morning.

Maybe I’ll just start walking on the treadmill.

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